Lydia.

It was a cold early Monday morning in early November. I stood, just like I always did, at the corner of the sidewalk waiting for Chris to come out of his house.

Finally, he emerged from his house. “Hi,” he said. “How are you?”

“Fine,” I said and turned away.  We started walking to school. As we breathed, our breath fogged up in front of us.

“Well,” Chris said to break the silence. “What did you think of the play?”

Last Friday, the play finally premiered.  We debated going to it since we lost the parts, but we decided to go to support the theater program, which I’m sure Mrs. Rubins appreciated.  “Well,” I said.  “It was okay.”

“Okay?” Chris said.  “The girl who played Hermia forgot her lines – twice.  And then she knocked over the set in one scene.”

“Victor was slightly overacting his lines as Lysander,” I added.

Slightly over acting?” Chris added.  “You could say he…”

“Now wait a minute,” I suddenly stopped.  Chris stopped beside me.  “We’re being really mean to them.  They worked hard on the play.”

Chris sighed and nodded his head.  “Yeah, you’re right.  I just think we could have done better – or, at least, a good job.”

The disastrous callback audition rushed back into my mind.  I cringed, just thinking about how bad we were.  Chris’s embarrassed face told me he remembered it all too. 

We walked in silence for a few minutes. “Do you want to try out for the Spring Musical?  I hear it’s Much Ado About Nothing.”

He nodded, and it was followed by another few minutes of dead air.

“We’re going to have to work on getting the emotion right,” I blurted.

Chris nodded but didn’t turn to me. “Of course.”

Several minutes later, we walked through the school doors.  Amanda walked toward us, eyes blazing.  I thought she was going to go around us, but she stopped in front of us. What was she doing here?

“We…need to get to class,” I blurted to her.

“Class doesn’t start for another seven minutes. I need to talk with you – alone,” Amanda pointed – to me.  Why did she want me?

I turned to Chris for support. I didn’t want to talk to this girl alone. I had no idea what she was going to say or do.

“Uh,” he started, “why?”

“Why?” She responded as if he had said the dumbest thing ever. “Because we need some alone time!”

She grabbed my arm and pulled me away from Chris.

“Hey!” I yelled at her.

Chris just stood there as she turned me around and pressed me against the wall.

“Look, you may not realize this, but while Jeremy may be the most pathetic loser in the history of time, he’s my most pathetic loser in the history of time.”

“Um, okay.” I didn’t know what else to say.

“If you know what’s best for you, you won’t hurt him, okay?”  Amanda said to me.

This conversation made no sense. “Well, I’m not trying to,” I said to her. 

Amanda looked at the ceiling like she was trying to find the words to say.  “That’s not what I meant.  What I meant was, don’t fall on him. I mean, don’t fall on top of him. No, don’t fall for him!”

It sounded as if Amanda, despite her repeated attempts to deny it, actually did like Jeremy.  She played it up as if she was like a sister, concerned for his well-being.  Yeah, right.

“Don’t worry—”

Suddenly a gruff voice shouted from behind Amanda, “What are you doing, Amanda Jacobson?”

She let go of me and backed away, without turning around. “Um, nothing, sir. I’m not intimidating her.”

The gruff voice continued, “It looks to me like you are intimating her. If I were you, I would stay away from her from now on. You understand?”

Amanda almost looked like she was shaking. “Yes, yes, I understand.”

“You’ll stay away from Lydia?”

“Yes, sir,” Amanda said, and she turned around mournfully to see – Jeremy!

He had a wicked smile on his face when she turned around.  . She walked right up to him and yelled in his face, “I hate you!”

“Leave her alone,” he said firmly.

She glared at us, then turned and huffed down the hall.

Jeremy turned to me with a look of sympathy. “You all right?”

I smiled at him. For once it wasn’t forced. “Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks.”

“Anytime.”

“Well, I need to get to class,” Jeremy said to me.

“Bye.” I waved at him and he started walking down the hall.

I turned to see Chris just standing there.  He slowly walked up to me.  I didn’t want to talk to him right now. He saw the whole thing and did nothing? I know I could have handled it on my own.  If I had come in alone and Chris wasn’t there, I would have been fine. 

But I expected my best friend to have my back.  I expected Chris to tell her off.  He didn’t.  My own best friend had to let me down. Then Jeremy had come out of the blue and stopped Amanda…but why did Chris just let her take me? Why didn’t he stick up for me?

“Uh, I’m sorry,” He squeaked out. 

I looked away. “It’s fine.”

“I should have said something,” Chris kept going. “I should have –”

“Look,” I said, “it’s okay. Can we go to class, please?”

I started walking away without waiting for an answer. Jeremy may be an egotistical jerk, but at least, he spoke up for me. That was more than what Chris did.

 

***

 

Lydia.

I replayed over and over again the scene that morning when Amanda came to intimidate me and Jeremy came to my defense. Why should I be mad at Chris?  After all, I should be able to take care of myself.  Why should I “depend on anyone else to handle my own problems – but Chris didn’t do anything! He just stood there. Those details kept eating away at me.

Yes, Chris could have said something to Amanda, or at least come over after she pulled away. Why couldn’t he speak up more?

Has Chris ever told you how beautiful you are?

Stop it, stop it! I kept telling myself that Chris still cared about me. I was being overly sensitive toward this situation.  I was angry over nothing. 

No, it was not just nothing.  Let’s say Chris was a girl, and Amanda came up to us.  I still would have wanted Chris to stick up for me.  My feelings were right about this.  I – I just want to forget the whole thing.

And Jeremy – yes, a few years ago, he did a bad thing to Chris.  But today, he did a nice thing to me.  He didn’t have to do that.  And Amanda hated him even more now, which I’m sure he did not want.  Yeah, I could have taken care of it myself, but to have someone stick up for you was a nice thing.  It was a great thing.

I grabbed my books from my locker; the school day was finally over.  I was startled and looked up as Jeremy called out to me from way down the hall, slowly walking forward as he did: “But soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east and Juliet is the sun! Arise fair sun, and kill the envious moon, which is…”

I was surprised by how good he was. I just did Romeo and Juliet last summer and I could still feel the emotion of the play when he quoted the lines. I knew he wasn’t doing it for me, but seriously, it felt a new side of him was coming out.

Usually, the rest of the students didn’t care if the world ended, but today they all turned to look at him. My eyes couldn’t turn away either. I felt fire and lightening again, just like at the dance. I could feel my face blush again. He was doing it. The balcony scene is one of the most romantic dialogues in the entire world, and he was doing it to me! Resist, Lydia, resist! Remind yourself why Jeremy is not worth it.  He treated Chris like dirt.  That should be enough. 

But he stuck up for me today.

He kept going. “See how she leans her cheek on her hand. O, that I were a glove, upon that hand, that might touch that cheek.”

“Ay, me,” I said before I could even think about it.  Stop, Lydia – but he’s so good!

“Oh, speak again, bright angel. For thou art as glorious as this night…” Jeremy kept walking closer. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see some of the other kids shaking their head. But at the same time, some of the girls were staring dreamily at him. But I kept my focus on Jeremy. “…when he strides upon the lazy-pacing clouds, and…sails upon the, uh, bosom, of the…um…air.”

Even though he stumbled over the words, he was trying really hard.  I thought he would be smirking, but he wasn’t. I don’t know how he knew I loved those lines, but it was like he read my mind. Jeremy had found the magical words to draw me toward him.

“O Romeo…” I started.  “Wherefore art thou Romeo,” I said as I dropped my bag.  “Deny thy father and refuse thy name; Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, And I’ll no longer be a Capulet.”

Jeremy turned to another guy standing by his locker, and said, “Shall I hear more, or speak at this?”  The other guy shrugged his shoulders.

I had to see how this ended.  I had to keep going.  “‘Tis but thy name that is my enemy; thou art thyself, though not a Montague.  What’s a Montague?” I rose up my hands to show I had no clue.  “It is nor hand, nor foot, nor arm, nor face, or any other part belonging to a man.  O, be some other name!  What’s in a name?  That which we call a rose would smell as sweet.”  Jeremy slowly walked toward me as I recited the lines.  “So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call’d, retain that dear perfect which he owes without that title.  Romeo, doff thy name, and for that name which is no part of thee take all myself.”

I jumped behind me when I heard Chris shout, “I take thee at my word! Call me but love, and I’ll be new baptized, Henceforth I will never be Romeo.” Everyone turned to look at me.

Chris! He’s finally speaking up in front of Jeremy. I turned to him. Just like in the play when he was Romeo, he was so eloquent. He knew the lines like they were a part of his soul.

I turned back to Jeremy and instantly felt a pang of guilt for coming toward Chris’ cousin. How could I even for a second consider him…what was I thinking?  But I was so surprised, and Jeremy started out so good…

I smiled but pretended to be surprised as I turned to Chris, “What man art thou thus bescreen’d in night? So stumblest on my counsel?”

 “By a name,” Jeremy called out to me. I turned back to him. “I know not to tell thee who I am: My name, dear saint is hateful to myself –”

 “– Because,” Chris jumped in. I turned back to Chris. “It is an enemy to thee. Had I it written, I would tear the word.” He pumped the air as I said the line.

Is this it?  Is this what I’ve been waiting for?  At long last, this had to be a confession of love from Chris. It had to be. I focused on Chris and said, “My ears have not yet drunk a hundred words of that tongue’s utterance, yet I know the sound. Art thou not Romeo and a Montague?”

Jeremy jumped in: “Neither, fair saint, if either thee dislike!”

I turned back to Jeremy, but I wanted to stay on Chris. “How camest thou hither, tell me, wherefore? The orchard walls are high and hard to climb, and the place death, considering who thou art if any kinsman finds thee here.”

Jeremy got down on his knees and yelled, “With love’s –”

“Light wings,” Chris broke him off, not missing a beat. “Did I o’re-perch these walls; For stony limits cannot hold love out, and what love can do that dares to attempt; therefore they kinsmen are not more let to me!”

Chris was my Romeo. He always was. I started to look at Chris and not at Jeremy at all. He loved me, I was sure of it now.

“If they do see thee, they will murder thee.”

Jeremy tried to cut in again, “Alack, there lies –”

But Chris was ready: “More peril in thine eyes than twenty of their swords: look though, but sweet, and I am proof against their enmity.” He was almost beside me now.

“I would not for the world they saw thee here.”

Jeremy cut in ferociously, “I have the night’s cloak to hide me from their sight.” But by now I only had eyes for Chris. “But thou love me.” He walked up beside me, but I didn’t care. “Let me find her: My life were better ended by their hate…”

Chris and I were mouthing the lines to each other while he said it. It was like he was reciting our love story.

After Jeremy trailed off, Chris picked it back up, “Than death prolonged, wanting of thy love.”

Finally, my love is coming true, more wonderful than I ever imagined. I’d given up hope, but now hope has been restored. Love, beautiful, wonderful love, washed over me.

“By whose direction found’st thou out this place?”

Chris knelt down and put his hands in mine. It was like performance night all over again. A few of the other girls squealed as they saw me do it.

“By love, who first did prompt me to inquire; He leant me counsel and I, I lent him eyes. I am no pilot; yet, wert though as far as that vast wash’d with the farthest sea I would venture for such priceless merchandise.” Chris got up and gave me a big hug. This is it!

As I heard the cheers in the background, I kept repeating to myself, he loved me. He really truly loved me. There was nothing that could keep the smile from my face.

As Juliet said, my true love is grown to such excess; I cannot sum up of half my wealth.

He whispered in my ear, “We did it. We finally beat Jeremy. It’s over.” Oh. Except that.

Maybe he didn’t love me at all.

Or maybe he was just trying to prove to Jeremy he was better at acting than him. I wish I had Juliet’s knife she killed herself with, that’s how I felt right now. 

“Kiss her, kiss her!” A girl from the crowd shouted out.

In a perfectly romantic world, he would do that. But instead, he said, “All right, all right, show’s over. Go…go home.” As if the whole thing was an act. I guess it was.

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Chapter 6: Leave and Never Come Back

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Chapter 8: Wilt Thou Leave Me So Unsatisfied?